Whitey

Whitey was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young
layers called pullets and eight or ten roosters, whose job was to
fertilize the eggs.

Whitey kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the
soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of Whitey's time so
Whitey got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each
bell had a different tone so Whitey could tell from a distance, which
rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an
efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

Whitey's favorite rooster was old Brewster, a very fine specimen he was,
too. But on this particular morning Whitey noticed old Brewster's bell
hadn't rung at all! Whitey went to investigate. The other roosters were
chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing
the roosters coming, would run for cover.

BUT, to Whitey's amazement, Brewster had his bell in his beak, so it
couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the
next one. Whitey was so proud of Brewster, he entered him in the county
fair... and Brewster became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result...

The judges not only awarded Brewster the "No Bell Piece Prize" but they
also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.

Clearly Brewster was a Democrat. Who else could figure out how to win
two of the most politically biased awards on our planet by being the
best at sneaking up on the populous and screwing them.